So, today is mega exciting because we are staying in the third most expensive building ever to grace this good earth – Emirates Palace!
To start at the beginning of June 17th, firstly we checked out of our regular five star hotel (I jest, The Marriott Downtown was truly a fantastic stay and I recommend it to anyone visiting Abu Dhabi) this morning and headed to The Louvre Abu Dhabi. This building is a bit of an architectural phenomenon. It looks a bit like a beehive or my pores when I don’t exfoliate on the outside, but inside the design style resembles the sort of Swedish simplicity of a very high end Ikea.
It’s a cross between a museum and an art gallery, and I was happy to see original Picasso (my favourite), Matisse and Van Gough amongst many others. I had a bit of a fascination with ancient Egypt when I was younger, so I found the mummy bandage from 300BC inscribed with hieroglyphics particularly exceptional, in a macabre sort of way.
After coffee with a view, we headed onto The Emirates Palace.
I’m just going to paste the link from the website because I don’t think there are enough words to explain how baller this place is (https://www.kempinski.com/en/abudhabi/emirates-palace/). I pulled the now frayed it’s my birthday card and got us a free upgrade (no shame); he also threw in a red rose because these Emirati men know how to treat a lady.
Our room is humongous and gorgeous and my photos do not do it justice. We didn’t spend long there because there is just so much to explore in this suburb of a hotel.
The brazen display of wealth evident within the tapestries, stairways, artwork, chandeliers and guests themselves reminded me of the Titanic – which is funny because as I had that thought whilst sauntering through the gold plated corridors, a dainty little trio of piano, flute and cello materialised and began to play “My Heart Will Go On.” Spooky.
The thing I love about the palace is that nothing is off limits on the scale of “Extraness.” Don’t wanna walk? No problem, we’ll drive you! Don’t wanna eat food that’s not gold encrusted? Never fear – we’ll coat, you gloat!
(As an aside, I just learnt about the GIF feature on instagam story and have really massacred it. Additionally, I couldn’t get any other proper videos to upload on this wifi, so I’m sorry for the terrible insight into what I find genuinely amusing.)
Requiring a sweet intermission to rejuvenate us from walking the whole length of the hotel (like the intrinsic peasants we are, we foolishly did not realise we could be driven), we gingerly made our way to a conglomeration of luxury sofas where people seemed to be enjoying their afternoon tea. Thankfully, I did not have to entertain the notion I would be having a mediocre dining experience for long; soon enough I was chowing into 24 carat ice cream, as that delightful trio serenaded me with the Bee Gees’ “How Deep Is Your Love.” For ice cream? It’s bottomless.
We’ve spent the afternoon lounging by pool one, as I had ridden enough camels yesterday. Tonight we are dining out on traditional Emirati food and I hope to catch a bit of the football and make the most of my last night here in the desert, so I’m going to sign off prematurely.
I’ve loved my time here in UAE. It’s such a clean, vibrant, friendly and welcoming country where manners cost nothing and everyone is smiling. I have found the minimal alcohol, maximal shisha culture invigorating. Next time, I want to visit Dubai, and hopefully spend a night camping under the stars.
Tomorrow, it’s onwards to my homeland, England.
“I know your eyes in the morning sun
I feel you touch me in the pouring rain
And the moment that you wander far from me
I want to feel you in my arms again” – Bee Gees